Known sperm donor · San Francisco

David Lee

I donate through artificial insemination only, work with clinics as well as at-home recipients, test every three months, and keep a limit on the number of families I help. I'd like any child I help create to be able to know who I am and why I did this.

Age

29

Height

181 cm (5′11″)

Ethnicity

Chinese

Eyes / hair

Brown / black, straight

Education

B.Sc. Computer Science, a top-ranked university

Work

Co-founder of two technology companies

Languages

Mandarin and English (fluent), some French

Method

Artificial insemination only; in person, shipped, or through a clinic

Location / travel

Based in San Francisco; I travel for most of my donations and can ship where logistics allow

Testing

STI panel every 3 months while active; whole-genome recessive carrier screening; hormone panel (normal, available on request)

Family limit

Ceiling of 30 families, revisited only in conversation with existing families

Contact with the child

Open to any level the family chooses, from photos to meeting before 18

Relationship status

Single; any future partner will know before things become serious

Public name

David Lee is the name I use publicly; my personal contact information is shared with recipients once we've matched

Why I donate

I first looked into donating while I was in the military, after I was presented with the opportunity to try out for my country's special forces selection. I've always wanted to see the world first-hand, the ugly and the bad included; that, along with the chance to serve with the best in the world, is why I was looking at a unit that deployed often.

Selection asks everything of you. It's pretty safe, but you have to be ready to give all of it; the tests are that hard. Picture navigating underwater mazes and solving puzzles, where passing out is a real possibility, with divers on standby to bring you back. The attitude is what they're looking for, because the job after selection carries real danger.

I'm an only child, and my family was big on, well, family. My parents had let me choose my own path, and to my surprise they were open to the military too. Some of my family had a military background, and I know it was on their minds, but they didn't want to restrict me. I also knew they had always hoped I'd have a family of my own. If the worst happened, donating wouldn't have replaced what they'd lost, but it was something I could do for them. I thought I would donate for a couple of years, keep the pictures and details of any donor-conceived children, and either tell my parents directly or leave them in my will, so they'd know I had thought it through and had them in mind.

Then I stopped, before any success. I had concerns about the liabilities I could create for myself and my own family, and I'd come to believe that a conscious life is sacred. A life is more than a number or a symbol; it's the potential for suffering, and I would be responsible, in some real way, for any life I helped create. Those concerns halted the donating, and my military career with it; I never attended selection.

I came back to it years later, deliberately, after hearing some of the stories: cold, clinical treatment, flaky or deceptive donors, questionable group ethics, and enormous amounts of money and time lost to all of it. I'd say people trying to conceive the non-traditional way have been through a harder battle than anything I've faced, and I mean that genuinely.

I've been healthy my whole life and my family history is clean going back generations. Just as important, I think I have the temperament this asks for. I'm considerate, and I can hold the interests of a recipient and of the child she's trying to have alongside my own, and put them first where they conflict.

Beyond the biology, I've learned a lot, mostly by finding my own way, and I've always mentored people when they wanted it. I can picture sharing what I've learned, and who I know, with the families I help and with their children if they ever want that. I say this carefully, because I understand the fears it could raise. I believe completely in people's autonomy, and I would never cross a line a family has drawn. Everything I can offer beyond the donation itself is optional, and only ever at the family's invitation.

How I work

Artificial insemination only. I care about how a child will one day understand the story of their conception, and I want that story to be clear and clean.

At home or through a clinic. I donate to recipients doing home insemination and I also work with fertility clinics, including for IUI and IVF when a recipient needs that path. I'm happy to go through a clinic's process.

Three donations per cycle. I suggest one two days before your peak, one on the peak, and one the day after, and I'm open to adjusting to what works for you. I practice abstinence around donation days so each one counts.

Anywhere. I travel for most of my donations, so I'll come to you, and I can ship where logistics allow.

Reliability. Once we've agreed on a cycle, I show up. I'm flexible with my time; I've shown up anywhere from early morning to midnight.

Health, testing and family history

Testing I maintain

• Full STI panel every three months while I'm actively donating; results shared with dates
• Whole-genome sequencing for recessive carrier status; I'll share results and cross-check them against your own carrier screen so we know we're compatible before we start
• Hormone panel, all in normal range, available on request
• Sperm analysis on request, and any additional test a recipient or clinic asks for

Track record

Home insemination: one pregnancy on the first cycle, one on the sixth. IVF: 100% fertilization rate across three sessions, all with frozen sperm. (As of September 2026.)

Family history

As far back as my great-grandparents, my family has had no early-onset disease, no hereditary cancers, and no neurological conditions. Every member lived past eighty, most of them through the hardship of the Mao years in China. I have no information beyond my great-grandparents. I'll answer any specific question you have about relatives on either side.

Family limit and the sibling network

I would like to help up to 30 families. I'd like to help more families than I realistically can, but I have many responsibilities beyond donating; I think about what a child would feel learning their donor treated it as a numbers game, and I won't be that donor.

The reason I don't set the number lower is that I think there is real value in a network, beyond the symbolic idea of a big community. I used to value doing everything alone; I've since learned how much a network gives you. A group of siblings across families, with different personalities and strengths, who know each other and can lean on each other, is something I think would be good for them. Joining that network is entirely optional.

The number can change, up or down, but only through a conversation that includes every existing family. Not just a vote. If the families I've already helped ask me to stop, I'll stop.

I keep in touch with recipients and will connect families with each other where everyone wants that.

The child

Contact. I'm open to any level of contact a family wants: photos and updates, letters I'll answer, a yearly conversation, meeting before eighteen, being present at the occasional event. I also respect a family that wants none of that. This is the family's preference, including the child's as they grow. Respecting that choice is a value in itself, whether or not I'd have chosen the same.

What the child calls me. Donor. I'm not a parent and I won't act like one. Whatever role I have in a child's life is the family's to define.

If I later can't have children of my own. Nothing changes. I would never cross a boundary a family has set. That would be unacceptable to me.

The truth. I want to work with families who will tell their child the truth about their conception from the beginning. When I had animals, I thought about them this way: they didn't choose their life and they didn't choose me, so I did my part as the one in control. A child I help create didn't choose either. I'd like to be someone they can find, ask, and get honest answers from.

Legal and privacy

Contracts. I sign a donor agreement, and I'm willing to work within the terms your lawyer drafts for your state or province. I'm honest about the limits: a contract records what we both intended, and that helps, but no contract is bulletproof in every jurisdiction. The one thing that protects us both most is that we conceive by artificial insemination only.

Privacy. David Lee is the name I use publicly. I keep my donating private outside of close relationships, for privacy and for the safety of everyone involved. Once we've matched you'll have my personal contact information, and I expect the child to have it too. This is discretion toward the public, not anonymity toward you.

About me

Work. I studied computer science at a top-ranked university and co-founded two companies, both at the point where software meets the physical world: commerce technology on one side, energy infrastructure on the other. Before that: the military, tech, and, briefly, Hollywood. I learned business by doing it, took risks, and picked things up everywhere I went.

Languages. Mandarin and English fluently, some French. If a child wants a link to Chinese language or culture and their family wants me to provide it, I can.

Now. Travel, the gym, reading, and seeing the new Nolan film in a theatre.

Then. Hockey, rugby, piano, clarinet, and drawing; I was a talented artist, especially at drawing in perspective. I was also good enough at programming that a couple of teachers assumed I was cheating. And parties.

Character, in actions rather than adjectives. I've helped several people build their businesses and find real success, working within their own values rather than mine. I defend my employees from unfair, impulsive criticism, and I pay them fairly, including with percentages. When I had animals, their quality of life came first. They ended up in my care without any say in it, they couldn't fend for themselves, and I was the one responsible.

Family. My parents are people of high integrity who showed it through action, something I only later realized wasn't the norm. It's why I find business relationships easy: I stay true to my word and I don't cross boundaries, so there's nothing to manage. My family are the silent professional type. My grandfather, a surgeon, performed what may have been the first successful hand reattachment at the forearm in China, among other innovations, about ten years before the official record credits someone else, because he was willing to improvise when other doctors wouldn't touch the case. He never published.

Photos. I'll share childhood and adult photos, and photos of my parents, with faces blurred at first. As we get to know each other, I'll share more.

For the child, if you ever read this

I came from a traditional family and found my own way. A few things I learned that I'd want you to know earlier than I did:

• Creativity isn't only for art; it's how problems get solved. I'd consider myself creative, but things I once thought weren't possible have become trivial more times than I can count.
• Personality differences are real and they run deep. Some people can be naturally incompatible, and that's nobody's failure. Ironically, knowing this can be what bridges the gap.
• Networking is a superpower, and I'm glad I eventually learned it.
• Learn to hear your own voice. It might come as words, or as images that seem to linger. It gets quiet if you don't practice listening.
• High integrity makes relationships easier, not harder. I've been fortunate not to have the backstabbing experiences in business that I hear about all too often.
• Go and see things first-hand. I'm very big on this. No amount of reading replaces being there.
• Everyone is always doing their best, at all times. I picked that up from a book on dialectical behaviour therapy, and it stuck with me.

If you want to ask me anything, I'm happy to answer.

Contact and what happens next

– David